Friendship: One of the true joys of womanhood


“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'” –C.S. Lewis


Friendship is not only one of God’s greatest blessings, but is one of the true joys of womanhood.

Our friendships can be a source of strength, joy, and inspiration…especially those friendships that exist among Christian women.

Friendships are often forged during those difficult times in life when we need someone who understands what we’re going through or during those busy, challenging, “young mama” days, when we long for another female adult with whom to share our struggles and joys.

The best friendships are those that lift us up and inspire us to be our best selves…those that encourage us to walk uprightly and to persevere, to laugh at ourselves and find joy in the mundane. I have known this kind of friendship in my life and I count it a blessing.

True friends will not allow us to wallow in our misery for too long nor to stray too far from “center” without lovingly bringing us back, even challenging us, telling us things we may not want to hear but absolutely need to hear.

Consider your own friendships. Are they healthy? Do you only seek friendships with those who will stoke your ego, agree with you at every turn, and enable you to live an unhealthy or unbiblical lifestyle?

Or…do you have friends who will challenge you when you are living a less than authentic existence and  straying from your faith and Biblical values…friends who will grow your faith and build your character as you watch their example and do life with them?

Not only should we look for women like this to enrich our lives but, it is our responsibility to be this type of friend to others, as well. It can be difficult to confront a friend who is drifting away from the faith or just heading in the wrong direction, but a true friend will do just that.

I am thankful for the godly women in my life to whom I look for inspiration and advice and am always on the lookout for new friends whose lifestyles and character I admire that can hold me accountable and walk beside me as I strive to be the best “me” I can be…all that God created me to be…equipped and prepared to shine his light in the world.

Here are some tips when you are seeking quality friendships with Christian women.

Look for women who:

Are NOT prone to gossip. Women who talk about other women are probably talking about you when you are not around! Gossip is warned against in the Word of God due to it’s destructive and hurtful consequences and it’s undermining of the gospel. “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much.” Proverbs 20:19

Value God’s Word, spend time in it, and try their hardest to live by it’s principles. Look for friends who not only claim to be Christians, but walk out their Christian faith in their everyday lives. If you followed that particular women for a day without her knowing, would it be evident that she is a Christ-follower? Of course there is no perfect person, myself included! But, as Christians, our closest friends should be those who will walk with us towards a more Christlike existence, not away from it. “Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, Lord.” Psalm 89:15

Will give you advice based on biblical precepts, not on their own opinions. When the time comes that you need advice about a life decision (relationship, kids, job), you need a friend who will lead you to God’s Word for the answer. Even if they can not take you to a particular scripture passage, at least they can give you advice based on biblical principles and ideals. It’s easy to find people who will tell you exactly what you want to hear in any given situation. It a treasure to find a friend who will help you seek God for the answer and then advise you according to his Word. “All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” 2 Timothy 3:16

Their are many types of friendships among women. Some are mentoring friendships designed to disciple and encourage a new or struggling believer. Some are “bridge” type friendships initiated to get to know an unbeliever so that we may bring her into the fold and share the gospel with her. But, as Christian women, we all need solid ongoing friendships with other mature Christian women who can inspire and encourage us as we strive to be salt and light in the world and to reach our full potential in Christ!




About Heart of the Matter

I am a southern wife and mom who loves reading, music, studying the Bible, and playing a game of tennis now and then. I also enjoy spending time at the beach and have amassed quite a seashell collection. I love all things southern: sweet tea, magnolia trees, comfort food and entertaining. I live in awe of what my Savior has done for me and desire to share spiritual encouragement with others.
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